These last months, I notice an increase in my daydreaming and sleep walking, catching myself in reverie as I go about my day. I read that birds experience episodes of both unihemispheric sleep and bihemispheric sleep where they go into REM states, dreaming. During their periods of migration, some can sleep on the currents of wind for a few minutes at a time, one eye open, one 'half' of their brain asleep. I also read that birds and reptiles have a hippocampus - a part of the brain responsible for memory formation and retention whose function is supported through the dream state. I wonder what birds dream about, perhaps certain songs and migratory paths, the bounty that awaits them in sunnier climates? I also wonder if I have seen a dreaming bird mid-flight? I feel a warmth spreading through my heart as I imagine the animals of this world dreaming. Sometimes I remind myself that as I dream, so do others, that we are generating a global electrical field of information where we have access to an infinite collection of stories from anywhere in and out of time as we know it. From first hand experience, I also know that we can dream on behalf of others and I'm curious about the messages I am channelling through the night which are for someone else to receive through a future conversation, innerdance or therapeutic exploration.
Others dream for me also and in these last weeks, it is our feathered friends who have been trying to reach me, choosing times when I have been in slow-wave or dream like states. A few weeks ago, as I am strolling home from swimming, feeling into the echoes of water and ease, I am awakened by a large gull descending into my line of vision. My nervous system activates as the gull intentionally flies towards me before hovering a few feet away from my head. I realise we are to have a conversation with the potential for a spiritual exchange. Alas, the first thing that spills out of my mouth is "Dude, you are flying low!". With that, I don't blame him for looking at my strangely before ascending and flying over my head. I chastise myself for the remainder of my walk for not being able to conduct an enlightened chat with this avian messenger.
The following week, in the innerdance waking dream state, I come upon Heron who is being attacked by territorial gulls. https://www.innerdancescotland.co.uk/post/heart-murmurs. This scene stays with me; I haven't seen Heron since and I wonder if he is alive, if there are future conversations to be had. I wonder if I shall have the presence of heart-mind to speak sagely and be in the receiving state if that happens.
I retreat to a very special place where there is ancient forestry and a river wild. As I walk through the marriage of trees, I hear a rustle in the hedgerow. I slow my pace as my eyes scan for signs of whatever creature might be alongside me. All of a sudden, a bird (whose species I have never seen), jumps out of the shrubbery and hops in front me. He then stops; it feels like he is inviting me to bear witness to him, to absorb his glorious qualities. He stays in his pause for over a minute before turning his head towards me and then hopping into another hedge. This feels like an extra-ordinary encounter and I decide to research what kind of bird he is (dunnock) so I can interweave his birdsong into my next dreamscape.
Five minutes later, another bird flies from a branch, swooping so close to my face, I can feel her feathers tickling me. Birds are intentionally entering my intimate spatial field. Can they sense my unihemispheric dream state? Is this the vibrationary quality they perceive as an invitation to come closer? Even my left brain cannot ignore the synchronicities which are accumulating. I feel comfort knowing the birds are with me, trying to communicate and pass on messages I am as yet, not able to fully receive.
I visit a local art gallery and purchase some postcard prints of beautifully painted crows. As I gently chat with the owner, they ask me how I shall spend my days; responding with "I have no plans", he says "you are winging it". I pause for a micro-moment in surprise. This person is a messenger too! I smile knowingly saying "Yes. Yes I am" with a tone which is the frequency of commitment and understanding. Oxytocin warms my blood as I bask in the joy of interconnection.
On the last day of my hermitage, I walk into the forest, curious about what avian wisdom awaits me. Within a few steps, I find the head of a crow or rook. It is the first time I have seen a decapitated bird. I step respectfully towards the bird and wonder what has happened. Its body is slightly further up in long grass. I pick up some small branches to create a cross to commemorate this glorious bird, sense permission to honour my companion with a photograph and solemnly continue my walk. These last weeks, the birds have generously showed me so much of themselves within the life-death cycle, very much mirroring where I am in my own spiritual process. When I return from my walk, the head and body are not there, neither is the cross, and I wonder if it had been a dream I needed to dream in the soft light of day?
This constellation of conversations has not yet integrated, I am yet to connect the dots coherently and I sense there are more messages to be received before their intentional communications shall be revealed. I acknowledge how each bird is representative of a part of me from the past, present, future. I am so grateful to each of them for showing me their medicine. All I can be right now is their humble student who knows less than they do but who is willing to slowly unfurl my wings, take a leap of faith and leave the comforts of the nest.
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